ASC special event: Dining with Mum

Dining with Mum: The value of connection, food, and community in motherhood.

They say it takes a village to raise a child, but what happens when your only option for safety requires you to leave everything and everyone behind?

Last Thursday, the hall at the Asylum Seekers Centre was transformed for an evening of storytelling, sharing of food, and celebrating motherhood in all its joys and challenges – in particular for women who arrived in Australia seeking asylum.

Friends and strangers sat together at shared tables. Pink flowers reflected the warmth of a mother’s heart and love for her children. Banana leaves topped with a delicious feast awaited each guest.

“Through Sangee’s Kitchen, my dream has always been to bring people together through food, culture, and kindness.” – Sangee

Sangee, a community member, came to show everyone what support from a place like the Asylum Seekers Centre can help people achieve.

Through challenges, she built her own catering business – Sangees Kitchen – and she was here to prepare a Malaysian culinary masterpiece for the tastebuds and the eyes. Yellow fragrant rice contrasted with the banana leaf, while the signature chicken curry tickled the senses. The black glutinous rice porridge was striking, edible flowers adorning the top.

“You are doing all those things without the village.” – Abang

As bellies filled, the evening’s host, Fatima, a staff member and refugee, took to the microphone along with a panel of three mothers who all came to Australia seeking safety.

Ekim, who fled Turkiye, said one of the truest things about motherhood; it is the most fulfilling experience of her life, while also being the most challenging. She recognised the challenge of not having her parents to call on if she needs help with child-minding. While she relies on some very good friends when she needs to, it is never quite the same as having your own family to rely on.

Thouraya spoke of raising her children in Australia, and what she hopes people would understand; the support provided to people seeking asylum and refugees isn’t a luxury. They’re not extras. They are essential for building a new life in a new country.

And our very own Deputy Chair, Abang, shared how her son – now that he’s a little bit older – shows a great interest in her journey from Sudan, through refugee camps in Ethiopia and Kenya, and eventually to Australia, and the cultural traditions from her – and thus his – heritage. Abang admitted when he was younger, he refused to eat the African food she cooked, eliciting a knowing laugh from parents of fussy eaters in the room.

“So here you are, too foreign for home, too foreign for here, never enough for both.” – Ijeoma Umebinyuo (as read by Fatima)

For all of the mothers on the panel, there was a wish for some balance between the culture they left behind and the new Australian way.

Language was very important to all, and some celebrated more than one Easter, and more than one Christmas, holding on to the old traditions while also embracing the new.

While some things in motherhood are more challenging as a person seeking asylum or refugee – many parts of parenthood are universal. That understanding and solidarity was reflected in laughter, smiles, and silent nodding heads.

The evening wrapped up with participants feeling inspired, grateful, and hopeful. Some carried Sangee’s Kitchen condiments they’d purchased, eager to support her business and excited to take her culinary delights home.

“Sometimes food is more than food — it becomes comfort, love, memories, and connection.” – Sangee

Opportunities for connection and joy are perhaps more important today than ever before, and this night was a perfect example of what happens when people from different walks of life come together to share food and stories. We empathise, we sympathise, we support, we laugh, we fill our bellies and our hearts with love, gratitude, and admiration.

So let us not forget to share a meal, share our stories, learn from one another, and support one another. May we always remind people around us – no matter where they come from – that they never walk the journey of motherhood alone.

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